January 25, 2007
Getting rid of pesty cell phone talkers, telemarketers, and overflowing
inboxes
Well The Three Tomatoes haven’t
been on a tirade in a while. And darn, they feel so good. And this week’s email is not exactly a tirade,
but more of a rant about some of life’s little (and not so little) annoyances; like rude cell phone talkers,
telemarketers, and unsolicited email, for starters. Think of it as the ugly side of technology. But the good news
is, there are things we can do to get even.
Those annoying cell phone users
According to last week’s Three Tomatoes’ poll, about 64% of respondents think cell
phones should be banned in restaurants, followed by 34% who think at least the ringers should be banned. Interesting, no one
voted for a laissez-faire policy. But before we rant, let’s confess. We’ve all had our guilty
little cell phone moments, like forgetting to turn our ringer off and having our phone ring at a very awkward moment and then just wanting to crawl
into a hole. And from time to time we’ve probably annoyed someone with a cell phone conversation too, truth be
told. But at least we know it’s wrong! We’re talking here about
those oblivious air-headed, dim-witted idiots whose cell phones go off everywhere (and usually with the most annoying ring tones like “Who
let the dogs out, ooh, ooh...”.) And the idiots who have loud conversations in public spaces and places without
any concern for the rest of us, and apparently with no embarrassment about having the most private and sometimes intimate conversations in the
presence of strangers. We’ve all heard them…the young woman on the quiet train in the morning who is telling
her best friend “all” the details of her Saturday night date; or those yucky conversations about medical problems that should only be
discussed in your doctors office (behind closed doors); or cheating spouses who are calling home with the “excuse”.
Jam ‘em
So rather than putting up with idiots, and silently fuming, here are a couple of
thoughts. The first is cell phone
jammers. Yes, indeed folks. These small cell phone size gizmos, which have actually been around for awhile
and cost about $300, will jam the cell phone signal. So you could be sitting on a train, or a restaurant, or wherever
“annoying cell caller” happens to be, and just surreptitiously take out your little jammer, and “zap” put the call to an
end. And you can keep doing this until “annoying cell phone caller”, finally just gives up.
It’s almost worth the $300. But beware, it’s also illegal and you could be fined big bucks by the FCC,
although we haven’t heard of the FCC actually going after anyone who’s done this. They’re probably
secretly thinking, you go girl!
Card ‘em
Okay, so we’re not going spend $300 for the jammer zappers, much as we love
the idea. But here’s a great freebie. A very clever ad agency in Chicago, Coudal Partners, created a very funny series of cards that can be handed out to
“idiot cell phone talker”. For example, one card says “Just so you know: everyone
around you is being forced to listen to your conversation, sincerely, the rest of us.” And then there are the
fill in the blanks, like, “We are aware that your ongoing conversation about (your boyfriend, your girlfriend, whatever) is very
interesting to you, but it doesn’t interest the rest of us at all….etc..” Here’s the link to download the cards. Of course, if
you’re doing this in NYC, we’d suggest you hand out the card and then run like heck!
Those annoying telemarketers
The Three Tomatoes have not received those incredibly annoying telemarketing
calls that would always happen at dinner time, or just as you’ve stepped into the shower, or at 8 in the morning on a
weekend when you could actually sleep late, in about three years. That’s because we registered our phone numbers with
the “Do not call” list. And thank
goodness too, because now we understand from friends who didn’t know about the “list” that telemarketers are using really
annoying recordings so you can’t even rage at a live person. And get this…telemarketers are now getting people on
their cell phones too! It’s bad enough that you forgot to turn your cell phone off at the theater, but then image the call
is from some jerk who wants to sell you aluminum siding. So here‘s what you do. Just go to
http://www.donotcall.gov/ and list your phone numbers, including cell phones and zap
those pesky telemarketers like bugs. And as for those other annoying people who call us at inconvenient times, well that’s
why God invented caller ID.
There’s a reason they call them
“crackberry’s
Okay, so whether it’s your Blackberry or some other handheld device
where you get your emails, checking them continually while you’re a) having drinks with friends; b) having breakfast, lunch or dinner with
your family; c) talking to your spouse on the phone and not hearing a word he or she is saying; d) driving in the car or e) all the above, just stop
it. We mean it, right now! Put down that device, pour yourself a martini, and enjoy a real connected moment
with live people. See that wasn’t so hard now was it?
Lighten up your inbox
Unfortunately, spam and junk email are still finding their way into all our inboxes,
despite spam blockers and all the other stuff we use to keep them out. But, there is a lot of unsolicited email you can avoid. So
here are a few of our little tricks. We never use our primary email accounts for ordering anything online or various
registrations because that will often lead to a glut of email we just don’t want. So step #1 is to go to yahoo, or
google, or hotmail and set up a new email address (it’s free). Step #2 is when you order anything online, make sure
that you have not inadvertently agreed to receive all their special offer mailings, third party solicitations, newsletters, etc..
You will find that many merchants automatically check the boxes “for you” that say, yes send me all your
email. Simply uncheck those boxes. Then if you’re still getting emails you don’t want (spam
excluded) look at the bottom of the email for the opt-out, or unsubscribe, which most legitimate marketers will include at the
bottom of their emails -- like at the bottom of every Three Tomatoes email. And while it pains us to see
people unsubscribe, and we can’t help but take it personally, we honestly only want you to get our emails if you really want to.
And we hope you really, really want to.
Well that’s our mini rant this week. What’s
bugging you? Email us at tomato@thethreetomatoes.com.
‘til next week,
The Three Tomatoes
Copyright©2007. The Three
Tomatoes. All rights reserved.
